


if i don't wake up dead

by dutchydoescoke



Category: The Magnificent Seven (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 14:33:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9127879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dutchydoescoke/pseuds/dutchydoescoke
Summary: He’s not dead, and there’s a split-second of regret over that fact that he can’t contain.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A fill for liggytheauthoress on tumblr, who prompted me with "I almost lost you" and Faraday/Vasquez. It was supposed to be a drabble. Brevity fail.
> 
> Warning for suicidal implications. Title stolen from Fall Out Boy's "Alone Together".

There’s a brief ringing in his ears when he wakes up, like someone’s drumming on the bell from the hotel desk, and it takes Faraday a minute to recognize that there’s a ceiling over his head and a bed under him.

He’s not dead, and there’s a split-second of regret over that fact that he can’t contain.

The sunset’s painting the room orange, light catching on everything and reflecting and refracting until the room is far brighter than it should be for the temporary resting place of the should-be dead. He’s sure that the scales are balanced already, that his death wouldn’t save any of their number that are more deserving of life, but he wants nothing more than to try evening the numbers anyway. They took plenty of Bogue’s men and lost very few of their own in comparison.

He’s not dead, and the regret twists into a grief that threatens to choke him.

The scales don’t appreciate aborted sacrifices, he knows. His mother had survived an illness meant to kill her and been struck down not a full day later by thieves; his sister had survived a childhood of starvation and disease and died at the hands of someone who’d had a score to settle with him. He cheats at everything, but death is one opponent he adheres to the rules for.

He realizes that the weight next to his side is someone’s head, and a painful shift lets him see the dark, curly hair that tells him it’s Vasquez, asleep in a position that gives him a crick in the neck just looking at it. The relief that crashes over him is almost overwhelming, and he almost wants to wake Vasquez just to be sure he’s not dreaming, but Vasquez is asleep and he won’t wake him. His shifting around, no matter how subtle, is enough to do the job and rouse Vasquez, who raises his head and blinks at him with a stupefied look, like Vasquez can’t believe he’s alive.

Faraday can understand that one, grief wrapping around his throat and tightening until he feels like he can’t breathe.

He’d never expected to survive. Not when he rode for the gatling gun, not when they strolled into town, not when Sam offered him the job. He’s not entirely sure what to do, now, though the relief on Vasquez’s face matches the feeling in his own chest. Maybe, just this once, the scales have balanced themselves out, have let him have something in exchange for all the death he’s dealt in over the years.

He gropes around, careful to not aggravate his injuries further, until he finds Vasquez’s hand and holds on. Vasquez’s look of relief softens and smooths into an expression that he can’t identify, can’t describe, but Vasquez is holding on just as tightly as he is and it’s enough for now. He’s sure recovery will be long and painful and he’ll spend just as much time wishing for death to collect as he did before, but it’s enough.


End file.
